Past Interviews:

So Cal Slyme
Plattsburgh Champs
Chicago Black Sox
New Milford Blazers
Queensboro Kings
Minneapolis Haymakers
Madison Fighting Mimes
Salem Cowtippers

April 17, 2000
by "Biggest Daddy"

Interview with Jeff Paulson, Los Altos Undertakers

BIGGEST DADDY: I believe Los Altos is much closer to San Francisco than L.A. Why are you a Dodgers fan?

JEFF PAULSON: You're right. I live about 45 minutes south of San Francisco. I'm a Dodger fan for two reasons. Growing up, my uncle was a big Dodger fan. He was known as Roger the Dodger. Of course he is now a Padre fan, but we don't need to talk about that. The other reason is my dad went to school with Ron Cey. I became a baseball fan right in Cey's prime with my dad cheering for him all the time.

BD: Why did you pick the nickname of Undertakers? 

JP: I really don't remember where the nickname came from. I just thought it was more intimidating then say the Blue Jays or the Padres.

BD: What position did you play in little league baseball? How would you rate your skills?

JP: Well one of the few things I can do well in life is run. I'm pretty sure I'm the fastest person in the BDBL. So I was always put in centerfield because I could cover some ground. In little league I was your typical #2 hitter. I took alot of pitches, got on base quite a bit (I remember leading my team in walks several years in a row). I could bunt well and fly on the bases. But I wasn't much of a hitter. I have zero power and tend to pull everything. So basically I could do everything but hit.

That was little league. Things are a bit different now. I am currently trying to get my arm ready to join a league where I can pitch. For years, I've played this one on one baseball game with my friend at a baseball field near by. The key to the game is accurate impressions of teams. So if I'm the Dodgers, I'd pitch just like Kevin Brown or Chan Ho Park. When I'm hitting, I would hit bat just like Sheffield bats...even bat lefty for the lefthanders. So what was/is a simple, fun game between me and my friend has really turned me into a pretty decent pitcher. Doing hundreds of different impressions of pitchers has made it so I can throw many different pitches
from many different arm angles. I've really worked at learning how to pitch. We shall see soon if all that pitching work means I'm actually a decent pitcher or if it means my friend just can't hit and I get lit up.

BD: What is the most memorable thing that ever happened when you were playing Strat-O-Matic baseball? Are there any player's cards that stick out as being particularly awesome? Did you ever make up your own rules (e.g. you can attempt to stretch doubles into triples, triples into homers, etc.)?

JP: I don't remember much about playing Strato...its been a long time. I do remember the first league I played in when the game went to the computer version. My first season was 1988. I didn't do so great, but I was a 12 year old playing against guys who were 25 and 30. I quickly learned how to play the game from them. So much so that I beat them in 1989. We made it so
you could make your ballpark however you wanted. So I built the Ossee Schreckengost (named after the former player who played in the late 1800's). The park was twice as bad as Coors field. Typical games were 16-13. I just remember Ryne Sandberg taking Dennis Eckersley deep to win the pennant. I was elated.

BD: You picked a lot of pitchers in the rookie draft. Which one do you think will be the first to wear an Undertakers uniform?

JP: From the rookie draft, I think Ben Sheets will be the first to make it up. But I think all the pitchers I took are a couple of years away, so it will be awhile before I see any of them. Looking back, I wish I had taken another power hitter or two instead of 5 pitchers. But I think I did fairly well with the draft slot I had.

BD: You were dissed early by the BDBL media and you seem to be playing with a vendetta. What would you like to say to your detractors? 

JP: I think my team's success on the field pretty much does the talking for me.  I may not have the best team on paper, but I've done a pretty good job of building teams that fit my managerial strengths. My style of play may not work for everyone, but it works for me. And I think people are taking notice that when you play the Undertakers you are in for a battle.

BD: Are there any BDBL GM's that have a thorough knowledge of the game or have major personality flaws that keep them from reaching their potential?

JP: I've been very impressed with many of the GMs in the BDBL. I unfortunately don't know much about the Eck league at all. But I following whats going on in the Ozzie league very closely. I really like the team Brain of the Mimes has put together. Mike from the Cowtippers has done an outstanding job of making his team into a contender this year when it looked like he wouldn't field a very competitive team when last season ended. Paul's Zoots flat out scare me, a tribute to the success he has had at building his team. I need to play a few of the other teams more before I can really comment on them.

BD: If you had a chance, what would you like to say to Rupert Murdoch? How do you feel he has done with the team?

JP: I have very mixed feelings about Murdoch. I hate the fact that he's buying up all of these players with all his money (Kevin Brown). But then I go out and cheer like crazy for the Dodgers and I enjoy the product that is put out on the field. I guess I would say to Rupert...buy me Alex Rodriguez and then go away.

BD: Who is your all-time favorite Dodger player?

JP: Orel Hershiser is my favorite. That was one of the worst days of my life...the day he signed to be a Giant. But it also meant that I could go and watch him pitch much more, which was nice. Then it became a struggle in my mind...do I root for players or do I root for uniforms. All I can say is, its a beautiful site seeing Orel in Dodger blue.

BD: Who will be playing in the BDBL world series this year?

JP: I would like to think it would be me...but I don't think I have enough starting pitching at this point to go all the way (if I even win my division). I think its going to be real difficult to beat the Zoots with Brown and Johnson. I think the Black Sox are a starting pitcher short, but something tells me that they will pick that starter up later this year.

BD: Bottom of the 9th, 2 out, tie game. You're on second and there's a single to right field. Phil Geisel (your BDBL foe) from the Litchfield Lighting is blocking home plate as you round third. Do you: a) Hook slide around the block, b) Slow down and let him tag you, c) Act like he's Ray Fosee and you're Pete Rose, or d) Slide feet first, spikes at slightly below waist (his, not yours) level.

JP: That's tough. I've really enjoyed playing against Phil the past year and a half. We are truly rivals and have had some classic matchups so far. So I wouldn't want to do any permanent, serious damage like sliding feet first into the groin. But then again, he did beat me in game 5 of the division series to advance in the playoffs...a series I was heavily favored to win.
Answer C.

BD: What do you do in your spare time?

JP: Besides playing baseball and basketball, I'm an amateur filmmaker. My friends and I make home movies whenever we have a chance. We've been doing it for about 8 or 9 years now. The films are slapstick comedies that aren't very good...but a ton of fun to make. I'm almost done filming a movie at the moment, just starting to edit it right now. Its my goal to one day make
a movie that I can be proud of, and thats good enough to send to film festivals and see what happens.